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WHAT HAVE I DONE?

This was my thought approximately 5 seconds after I stupidly agreed to accompany some colleagues to a beginner’s CrossFit class next Thursday morning.

  1. At the time when I accepted the invitation, this is what I knew about CrossFit:
  2. It hurts
  3. There are weights involved
  4. I might throw up
  5. I’ll probably be extremely sore the day after
  6. It hurts

So naturally I googled it, because of course Google knows everything. Here’s the first search result when you google CrossFit: “Welcome to CrossFit: Forging Elite Fitness”. This is extremely off-putting. ‘Forging’ sounds painful. I immediately (for some weird reason) started thinking about forging metals in a hot furnace and then bending them into the shape wanted. See, painful. I also strongly dislike the term “elite fitness” – I don’t know what it means, but whatever it means, it is not for me. I am neither fit nor elite.

So why would I ever say yes to it?

I figured I could give it a try. One time, right? Try everything once, how hard can it be?

Here’s what the official CrossFit website says about CrossFit:

“CrossFit is the principal strength and conditioning program for many police academies and tactical operations teams, military special operations units, champion martial artists, and hundreds of other elite and professional athletes worldwide…The CrossFit program is designed for universal scalability making it the perfect application for any committed individual regardless of experience. We’ve used our same routines for elderly individuals with heart disease and cage fighters one month out from televised bouts. We scale load and intensity; we don’t change programs.”

Yay. More words I don’t like, such as ‘load’ and ‘intensity’. As much as I love the CrossFit explanation – I still don’t get exactly what it is. What I really want to know is, what will I be doing?

Frida gives a slightly more helpful explanation. CrossFit training is varied. It’s harder to pinpoint the ‘downward dog’ of CrossFit, but if there was one exercise you could name in association with CrossFit, it would likely be ‘Snatches’. Here’s a video: (click here) – I’ll still explain it, but the video will help.

The video is terrifying. You start with your feet apart and your knees bent, then as you pick up the weight you squat low, somehow launch it over your head, stand straight and hold it there for a second, and then lower it again.

Here’s hoping that’s not what beginners class looks like.

Frida says that CrossFit combines a number of different exercises, not just snatches (thank God). She actually said it feels like they’ve thrown together a load of difficult exercises and called them a workout. Yay. Here are some of the difficult exercises you might find in a CrossFit WOD (workout of the day):

  1. Sandbag training – I watched a couple videos; in one of them the guy squats, and then lifts the sandbag to rest on one shoulder, then he squats again, and on the way up moves the sandbag to rest on the opposite shoulder – and for those of you wondering, this involves a real sandbag, the ones that are used to stop rivers overflowing their banks – yup
  2. Wall Balls – You stand facing a wall with a heavy ball in your hands, you drop to a squat still holding the ball, then you push up from your legs and throw the ball into the air, before catching it and going back into squat position. You repeat this over and over again – yay
  3. Battle rope exercise – There are different versions, but in one I saw it looked like this: bend your knees a little – not as deeply as a squat – and holding the two opposing ends of a rope, one in each hand, you twist your arms outwards causing ripples in the ropes

There are also bodyweight exercises like burpees, squats, and mountain climbers; but it’s clear Frida is right, all of these are difficult.

If I had regret when I accepted the invitation, that regret has quadrupled. But I’m a woman of my word. So next Thursday morning, in the words of Jackson 5, I’ll be there.

– Femi

photo cred: CrossFit Grandview

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4 comments

  1. By Andre on Thu Feb 04 2016

    Don’t worry, you will like it! ?
    Let us know how it went

    • By 356688 on Wed Feb 10 2016

      It’s not bad

      • By HD Wallpapers on Sat Feb 13 2016

        Beautiful work, as always..

        • By blade & soul gold on Tue May 03 2016

          You bet!